All I remember was I made love to him telepathically, I felt him.. was it him? A feeling I cannot and will not forget.
I somehow was pulled into his energy one morning and I was caught up in ecstasy.
I guess this drive I feel towards him is something unforgettable, nothing else or no other soul could possibly compare. Complicated in my ways, I sometimes feel that it would be to hard to love me. . that I’d over complicate things.
That my longing is too strong, and deep and at times cut off and disconnected. This I don’t mean to happen but it does and how can one be loved in such uncertanties.
He has never come close to me apart from being close to my soul, apart from spiritually being a face I hold on to.. although I hadn’t looked into him long enough. I stumbled into this love, and never knew I did.
Three occasions I had seen him, The 1st I was crossing a road and he came out of the cafe and his presence roared at me.. I had to look away.. I felt it deep in me.. the second I don’t think he knew I saw, I looked out the bus window in awe of him.. as I was returning home from work.. his focus ahead of him and neither looking elsewhere. He was the only one I noticed on that road, although there were people entering the grocery store ..he strongly caught my attention.. he just looked ahead. The third time, I saw him turn into a road..with the corner of my eye.. and my spirit leaped but I continued on until my heart beated with his.. or for him maybe.
As if things weren’t already strange, from that day everything changed. I didn’t realize it was him I was feeling, having been so caught up on a past incident and my mind trying to make sense of an eye connection that played with my emotion I somehow didn’t realize he was the one I knew deep down I felt. I had no idea why but that day on the bus when I saw him something in me recognized him.. I was so fascinated by him in the most awkward way.. my breath .. I gasped.. on all 3 occasions.
I somehow went through ups and downs, tricks in my brain and I had no idea what I got myself into but I realized I was stumbling in love with this young man, and I didn’t know him.. only of him.. I guess everything is connected. He’s touched me in places that no one has, and my feelings have opened up in ways that I never knew they would for anyone in this lifetime.
So fierce, and calm.. a gushing river and then it transforms into a rocket zooming out of space. . a space only I know of.. I never knew he would know. . or come close enough to know.
I felt him and I allowed him to feel me, and life continues to proceed onwards, and for all I know this experience was something that some say doesn’t always last. I still think about him, I wonder what he’s doing and if he’s okay.. sometimes it’s like he’s here and then he’s gone.. but i’ve also got to live my life. . otherwise I would go extremely out of it.
What to do when your whole life has been dramatically impacted by something that is far deeper than I could imagined. Something that took a hold of me and it’s winds blew me to and fro. Where everything fell apart and you have to somehow find a way to put it back together again.
He wasn’t an obsession he was somehow a heart experiment completed. He managed to woo me, and I had not been woo’d as strongly as this in my LIFE. No one has woo’d me in my life but he.
There’s a whole range of emotions emerged into one in this writing. Where ever he is, he may remember.. I may run in his mind.. or he mine.. but a long lost love is just merely that isn’t it. The desire to connect deeply in you with another and once it’s done.. I guess the story ends.
Do I want the story to end.. no.. but I don’t know how else I’d react to the story. Maybe the idea of he truly making love to me in reality is something that I think.. what would it be like?
How would I be.. possibly.. breathless.. in deep connection with his core.. would our souls really dance in tune with eachother. I’d never know, all I know is how his energy ran through me .. caressing me.. intertwining with mine. All I know is what I experienced.
I’m a strange young lady in a silhoutte world. . . Love is stronger than death, Love is a lightening powered by a force of wind, Love is a secret parable wrapped in the arms of warm tenderness. What is a deep mesmerizing experience to do .. alter my perception on a feel I knew existed, on something I was highly aware of? Should I continue being it’s role, or at times we step down off the whole wheel of this silhoutte world and understand what we are, who we are and why we deeply connect with others.
I love him, but love itself is more than just what we think.. we have not yet understood it’s intent … we somehow sway with the notions.
I’m a strange young lady in a silhoutte world, and he found me only to woo me. . . and to whom will I look upon.. in this spirit.. and who will look upon me. I guess his spell was my antidote. . my response an endless rebirth.
I’m just a peculiar young lady in a silhoutte world.