Souls Eye, Eyes of the Heart.

Isit our own forbidden story.

8.

From the moment I saw him, I understood the feeling.. the knowing. The same feel never changed. I pondered on it, never forgot it. Words can’t even explain, I guess my hallucination made me imagine so much, took me into a different part of myself, some parts I had already explored. 9 years is a long time to not forget someone, to somehow disappear in the mist and then be reminded of the one person whom you felt the most without words, although there was so much I wanted to say and did yet still the words weren’t real enough.. I knew saying nothing at the same time was also a way of just allowing myself to just feel or maybe not. Whenever I spoke to him, or was around him I felt that high sometimes making me silent or other times making me want to talk so much. Though I never got so many chances with him, I understood what I felt more than words. The Souls eyes awakened long ago, seeing him in school made me recognize another, just like me. I could write for days but for some reason I’ve given up expressing this, maybe because deep down it hurts but yet its healed.. maybe because I somehow feel that it will never be the same, although its never meant to be is it. Things change. People change.. thats the sad thing about life. The world gets the best of us, swallows us into it’s maze into its hole. I’ve never cared for someone as much as I did he. For me its like the souls eyes knows it doesn’t need to be close, even though it sometimes desires his closeness. I even feel deep down it’s best I let go, the one thing I know is that sometimes that which is so strong can consume and take you away from everything – I don’t want to even think about it.. I shouldn’t. It’s that which is not recognized nor seen but we see.. the unseen in us allows us to see.. to swallow up everything and feel every part smother you and yet never let go.. to dissolve – completely. There will never be another soul who can move me like he did, but there is bound to be others who can relate. Being naked will never be enough, to enter me and me into him is just the beauty of the magnificant essence alive and existing. There is more, it doesn’t matter that it took all of me, there is more – we go beyond what we know, way more. Its not as if he has that hold on me, no man can hold the Christ in a being. They can believe they can by speaking it into existence but we unravel existence.. us unseeners. . where do we come from some ask.. only The Creator knows. Heaven and Earth will pass away but my word will remain.. spoken directly from the Christ. Son of Man, Son of God. My souls eyes I love him, he probably won’t understand that love. I don’t expect him too, I really don’t. Nothing can buy it, the fact it took me too my own madness whether he was the foe or genuine, who knows but I believed it – always did from when I was younger.. I don’t want to say no more. I have to let go.. otherwise i’ll be ripped apart even more.

+

The eyes of the heart was secretive, need I say more? It beated with my own – what did he.. the heart want to prove, that it was just like me? Stepping out to view one – I see you, 3 times in fact. Wondered if you saw into me, if you felt me. . if you did then what did you think. Was this your game too, nosey much?

*smiles* I wonder if you’ve been ripped apart, if so you must of enjoyed the show. Front row seats, maybe? Who knows. Your secretive, silent in your movements.. doing more than what is actually seen. Speak the truth from the heart. It’s deep, we are all deep. Some more than others. It’s not that simple, but it is – should I scream at you? Should I smile or look away quickly? Its not even me is it, the fight, the pull and tug – unrecognized.. It’s hidden comfort. In the warmth of it’s own being – you play hard to get heart, you know it. You just can’t be captured, you were always captured and you always dug and dug and dug and never stopped. You asked and asked and never stopped. Present, held and so it was never outside of yourself – It promised you it would hold you and you believed it.. eyes of my heart – you never lied. I went to that dimension of the heart, the holder of my heart held my hand and I looked behind at the world waving.. being guided through the unknown. Little me. So why did you beat with me? To find out my secrets and what would you do then?

You are just as special, the softness is something delicate.

A roar, I see you.

Inevitable.

Firm.

True.

 

 

 

A Soldier

I’m caught away with something, whatever that something is.

I’ve felt all I could. . . is feeling ever enough.

The mind doesn’t want to battle anymore.

I’m holding strong, I don’t want to be weak. . . I don’t want to fall. I’m staring out of no where but what this place I imagined to be is not exactly a fantasy land. It was never a fantasy, not to me.. but now I’ve been gone with the wind – taken away from everything I knew.. and left not splattered but courageously standing.. I remember. .

Who knew that eyes could make me lose my focus,

a moments heart beat could day-dream my whole sanity. .

A deep stare in slow motion could tickle my inner stomach…

A small talk could excite my being once again.

It’s a hold, no letting go.

A heavy breath, one breath, one pant.. ai..

I won’t run then would I – would be so entangled inside the inside with this natural mystic. . maybe it’s the both of us.

It was never a war, it was reality. Every part of it, every pain, every inner scream of passion, every tear, every word spoken as I walked up and down my bedroom panting. Spiritual cries.. a soul yearning.. I shouted at myself, talked myself out of it all.. Oh the things I did for this feeling.

Everytime I came out the bath and stared at me, naked.. I said nothing. .Just stared. . . no feeling but the space of this invisible person.. this man I never knew.. as the water dried I would silently smile inside. Hugging myself saying it will all be over..

He just don’t know how strong it is..

How weak it can be..

How it can let go. . .

How it can play freely and still not let go of the hold.

Just for he. .

A soldier.

I whisper to myself once again..

“Please young Lady, don’t run. . don’t run. . Be Free”

 

 

The One III

It was meant to be continued..

perspective is everything.

You have to die to live. Grace is given for this, is it not.

This divine nature, this spiritual power this gift is the design in which we become one, in ourselves and with eachother.

Should I make it romantic, should cupid come out and point it’s arrow at me?

Should I catch butterflys, and then chase you around. . .or maybe, be hypnotized by you and lose my sanity?

We have choices, there is a will and there is a way.

I guess emotions somehow play a role in this discovery but they have no say on the outcome. The deepest self, the spirit is a lamp to God, searching through the inmost self and yes this part of our connection to the Supreme determines our outlook and our perception on the mysteries we find in the essence and presence of divine love.

A young woman as myself, in search of nothing but life and it’s fulfilling gifts, it’s treasures in Spirit in the mist of distractions and false concepts..

To tell the truth I once fell in the trap to the seed that was meant to destroy men. Yes, the good and evil – the serpent seed somehow tried to destroy my knowledge on Love – but it could not take away the God in me, the Christ in me.

The serpent was cursed, she was cursed and he was cursed, this whole order was corruption.

I was born on solid rock and found my way through life with the solid rock by my side. The whispers of the lies, that the serpent tried to feed me so it can take my seed and hallucinate me as one day I breed new borns in this world with no Godly character, instruction, foundation, education, and spiritual awareness of all in all – connected in One-ness of life..to have dominion in what God has given them. The lies wanted me to fall a victim to it, to become it. To run wild in romance, as I pondered on the special one, the one to sweep me away and even so to control how it would happen, to lead it to happen, to gain as much information to bring him to me. . .to think I could possibly be in the same lane as God is destruction. Oh how knowledge is deceptive.. to come out of your knowing-free and true in you-to be whipped by the illusions of love-the whisper of a lie, to turn the order into a mess.

She was decieved.

She needed to understand it was not her call to make decisions abruptly, for her own hidden agenda, she needed to have consent. With who?

The God who lives in her, and her submission is to God before any man but the gift of Men is the gift of seeing God alive in him, a head, a decision maker and one who brings his one and only in equal union with him.

She is subject to him and must pass everything to him to make an equal decision. I can’t know everything and I am not designed to lead in anyway that means calling the shots above a man, who do I think I am. Do I live ordained by man or by God. Divine love is the The Father, The Son & Holy Spirit alive and at work within him and me, our family and the home in which we choose to build.

To desire to know more than what has been allotted me will lead me in the hands of a lie, to stay one in the truth I already have within me and blossom with it inside my soul – surely will lead me to the all knowing prosperity from the Tree of Life. The Holy Spirit always spoke to me and showed me what I had to understand even when it hurt, we always keep learning and growing and I learnt when we are eager to love and to share ourself without truly knowing the full extent of Love in us, ascending through us and its true origin beyond us with all and in all – out of the universe – unmeasured – omni through what we cannot even begin to imagine, you will break down.. you won’t be strong because mens knowledge of Love is a deception, that will kill you. . only a man who holds that true love can die to live again.

True Love is found on the cross, implemented on one’s own relationship with the grace of God within their Spirit creating in them a better character, a new man, willing to walk in the full image of Love and share that relationship with someone else and the whole world.

The 2 become 1 is an act of sanctification, a will of a supreme power at work between a spiritual being and their creator.. the tree of good and evil to the tree of life, making love through the pain.. the pain we all choose because we live blind to the truth.. even so this same act of sanctification as shown between 2 individuals who have seen the mercy, forgiveness and love from their creator must show it towards one another – the sacred out of this world love but enters in us because it’s imprint is still with us, by us, guiding us.

God is Our Sacred source – He is the head – She is his side.

Now the origin of the truth can manifest and their home be blessed.

She must lean on God, for God is her sword, her meekness, her submission, her authority, her strength – making her an equal heir to this gift of life, alongside the precious man in whom pursues her.

Her Love is an anchorite.. the man whose Spirit has returned to it’s true knowledge of its fruitfulness and his leadership, and his essence empowered by the Love from the heavens can only capture her.

The One is in all who have found the true One within them.

The Tree Of Life.

CHRIST.

LOVE ETERNAL, LOVE FOR LIFE, A LOVE SUPREME IT ALWAYS LIVES ON.

We knock on it’s door everyday and it awaits our call.

One.

The Pursuit of Love

You’ve seen a feather right?

The way it flows and has it’s own rhythm.

You’ve seen a singing bird haven’t you, sitting on the bark of a  sweet cocoa tree relaxing to it’s own melodies.

You have seen two lovers, hold on tight to eachother – that sweet surrender of a comfort gaze in eachother eyes. Do you know what it takes for us. . .they echoe to the world, for us to feel this way, be this way, give this way – to be empty and full of eachother – free and yet joint – one but yet individuals.

Vulnerability. Intention. Mastery.

These are elements of ourselves we use everyday, sometimes we hardly recognize it. I often time’s wonder why the revelation itself to this supreme essence of our beings is unexplainable, words try to tell the tale of an infant growing..learning and branching out.

Words are a fragment of this pursuit.

We linger behind them hoping they come out correct, that they are organized and not muddled. In an exhausting yawn I’d say they are never ending words.

Poetry, conversations, debates, arguements, letters, stories, songs, rap’s, sign language, speeches and any more beautiful ways that we use words to articulate our emotions and express feelings.

Each civilaztion must learn what the pursuit of love is, each generation must undergo the trials of intimate living – the trials of Spirits who long for deeper sense of Life.

A tree is beautifully perched on the soil, to and fro it’s branches and leaves wave to every living being. The waters beside it recieving it’s love as it intimately connects with the particles released in the air. . .this is the flow of their aliveness – their own friendship.

In sync.

You and I, I and You, Us both.

Imagine dissolving with the ocean.. becoming the water itself, to chase the wind as it beats against your wave. To hold the boat as it leans on you for strength, to wash his feet as he stares out at the far end of the sea, mesmerized by the soft touch of the ripples.

Its real right? Us.

We keep beginning and as people we never want to slip away, sometimes we do though. To not be weighed down by the unfortunate realities in the world but to honour the truth in the reality of it taking place.

Souls in a land burderned with unpleasent history.

It lurks in the forests, an ambush of rebels – a howl of an owl – informing all living creatures of an intruder, yes..

The earth cries blood of innocent men, the suffering of helpless women, screams of children playing, wails of a hungry baby.

The world.

It unexpectantly forces you to be silent, pulls you in and pushes you out.

Do we grow too quick.

Do we seek much.

Are we learners of a superior world out of this solar system – I’d answer that question as yes.

Its the forbidden fruit that led us to question all that we ever were, who in which we were to serve. It was the forbidden fruit that carved a deep longing inside us, to desire depth of a life questionable and unquestionable. It was with us, it was us, the longing was not longing, it was your side and mine.

Era’s of human philosophy transcending limits of the evolution of men yet circulating in the same bubble. We sought to be in touch, yet we are untouching the touch – the ever breathing emotion of what is.. not us but all.

No matter what goes on in life we solve not everything, for minds of men are occupied with the thoughts of the ‘morrow or how to provide for today.

Society has changed much.

Life has changed, and continues to do so. *smiles*

We must bear in mind, nothing is new under the sun.

We ought love in One.

It’s easier said then done isn’t it. Some of us hide away from such pollution, some of us seek to build better for our loved ones, some of us tired and exhausted of a system that has no nutrients, but is a disease to human nature.

Yours sincerely, we aspire to be words so dearly.. that smother you with home and glee.

Where is home, and what is our glee.

The heart has the knowledge of its own – and in that building it forms a home. The Spirit has a quietness to its being, within it lies a soft glee of essence transcending time and eternity.

Where there is nothing, nothing but the sweet merry feather floating in the air . . .

Right in the mist of that feather, flys a dove and behind the dove a sweet angel sings a song ‘My little sunshine’

The pursuit of love could none else be but the experiment of life’s whole existence, not me, not you, or we but the talking prescence alive between it all.

Observing as it was, as it is and now.

Let there be light, and yes.. it shone and formed all for all to see.

Silence.

 

 

Dear Jesus XxXxX

I bet your looking at me now like what do you want now.

*smiles*

I never write my prayers out in public but thought to type this out. Right now, I wish I was up in the heavens singing with the angels and those pretty flowers I saw singing to you ever so beautifully, on the greenery by the pathway going towards the amazing waterfall in the centre of the city. Your throne is woah.. like woah.. this earth and it’s luxuries CANNOT BE COMPARED TO YOUR THRONE AND THE HEAVENS, AND ITS BEAUTY.  The city itself is unfathomable but your throne, is just… muuaaaad. This is something any man will know when they get the chance to see it, not only in prayer but in you inviting them to see you on the throne. I hope more people experience it, when they do hmm.. boy oh boy.. will they realize that The Fathers throne ain’t no joke! Jesus your on the right side of The Father so you kicking it back, chilling.. watching us all.. intervening with your mercy, love and forgiveness. The Holy Spirit, ahhh couldn’t be more greatful.. so so so greatful for such an amazing gift bestowed upon me. Thankyou Jesus, honestly.

Those flowers sounded so beautiful, better than any voice ever heard on planet earth, I remember I use to ask you to give me one of their voices lol every prayer haha but hey who knows maybe everytime we praise abit of pollen from those flowers in heaven gets put in our spirit to enhance our praises..

It feels different, our relationship. It seems like it’s grown, its been a struggle but a blessing. I’m blessed. I don’t say that much but deep down knowing you and what we have shared I know it. You seen me through so much. No one will ever know what you mean to me.. and to others you have also helped in this world too.. mad love to them! I’m still the little me that gets up and sits on my bed talking to the open space/air and literally catching jokes with you over things people would probably find weird, you still listen though.

No words will ever express so much of your love that you have shown to me. I may not be out there, and associate with the world much or even you know, be apart of the boxes of this society.. which makes me abit weird .. but i’m cool with that..

When I tried to be in the box you kept telling me off!!! Like man the punishments I got was bare weird like, it was as if you was here proper, like a dad would discipline his child in real life physical form. Your here though, I know. I feel you. I feel so honoured to know you and to experience your truth in my life. The battles we fought and the wars in the spiritual realms have been real.. Some went by silently.. it’s crazy, you somehow made me silent in them.. when they were so huge. I’d still be talking about you, telling others of you whilst battling in darkness. Was it to make me stronger? Or to be able to know that it’s better to trust you than to put trust in man? I firmed alot, barely had friends and was always home alone haha so had no choice but to kind of deal with life and the call the way you planned for me.. even when I tried to run and not be home you always called me back. I understand your providence in my life has been real, very real. You’ve actually taught me everything Christ. No church, no religious leader, or even my Ma taught me and trust you know she is faithful boyyy, it was you..the Holy Spirit literally guided me in everything I have come to know.

Everything I didn’t understand you would show me, all I did was ask. Visions, dreams, people along the way that came and just words they would say.. Journaling my whole experiences with you.. reading books and discussing them with you in my bedroom as always. I remember John many years ago when I was 17, Ma’s friend .. I remember he told me, the Holy Spirit was his best friend, that he would laugh with it..and sit down in his living room discussing everything and just be smiling. In my head I was thinking thats me though, I do that. He told me all this wide eyed with a face of love.. now I understand. I fully understand what he meant. From young I would talk to you sitting on my bed but you finally came to me and showed yourself to me in my bedroom when I least expected it. Thats when the talks elevated, thats when you became more real, even though I believed.. I wasn’t just sitting there thinking I’m just talking and hopefully you hear. So you do listen..the dove was real and BEAUTIFUL, all 5 of them. How many years of me just talking to the air and BAMMM you appear when i’m 19, your always there..you are always there despite how we feel, ain’t got nothing to do with the world like that. Its Love man, real love.. priceless.

You have held me up, through things I didn’t expect to experience earlier in life in the spiritual realms and later on till this day too. Theres purpose for everything, a reason for everything. My faith in you will never go. I just hope in you and pray with every part of me you never leave me. Your my best friend. I think now as I sit and ponder about this all i’m forced to be stronger and bolder than ever. You have been my solid holder, literally.. where would I have been.

Every experience, my diaries, my love poems, every deep emotion connected to the depth of spirit I have felt because you was there allowing me to experience all the things I journeyed through. I guess sometimes, I wondered why? Questioning my reactions, my actions, my thoughts, my being. How could such faith be tested ongoingly, but life is a battle of the flesh and the mind with the heart and our spirit. . . to those who seek realness in the pain and struggles of life within themselves and outside of themselves.. you walked it, so you know.. divine as you are.

Did you ever think why did the Father not take the pain away Jesus? When you had to carry that cross, even though you knew you had to die for the truth and for mankind to know that truth in themselves through your walk.. even though you knew it was what you were called to do.. You probably didn’t think at all right, you just said your will be done Lord, and then went along with the plan.

Its a serious life we live, the narrow way is very serious. You said it was a hard road but in the end leads to life, and that is life to the full a blessing you give your children who seek you in Spirit and in Truth. You were right. This I knew in my heart growing up that this world was no ordinary world and other worlds existed. Innocence is sweet, life a gift.

Theres things about this life that some people haven’t come to realize, some people are aware of it and others are not. I have  been in my little bubble with you for so long, in and out of this knowing. I was acting like Jonah once the bubble got burst it was like my whole world was over. I couldn’t be a baby anymore.

*smiles* Your proper my day 1 .. like literally.

Your the only one who kept your word to me in this whole life.

Psalm 27 said it well. So I had to grasp it for myself.. sometimes parents forsake their children.. and children forsake their parents. We are always to put our faith in you before everything. So at 12 when I made a decision to get baptized, after all the weird dreams you kept showing me ..I said it would always be you. I made a vow you would be my best friend. You seriously have been, it’s funny but true in my mistakes I’d secretly come back and cry it out, some things I never understood but man in my softness you did make me strong even when it appeared I was a pushover or just plain weak! Acting tough was me trying to be strong but it didn’t work lol. Life has been changing for everyone, for centuries.. everything you said about sin, righteousness and judgement of this world was true. We cannot deny it, the believers know. There own lives are a living witness to it.

We seen it before, we’ve seen too much before it’s time.

We have lived.

Your my roar.. fully exposed.

Its alot for me, for us all of faith. . but you said you’ll never leave us nor forsake us so I’ll trust you through it all. The journey of Long Life Souls in Narnia.

I love you Jesus.

So to the next part and stage of my life through this seemingly time travelling society, please take my hand and lead me, guide me on the narrow path continuosly, and I all I ask is just please don’t leave me man lol even though you won’t I just need to say that! You already know, you already know it goes. Let my heart to be courageous and kind, honest and loving. My spirit to always remain loyal to you and then to those close to me.

I hope my life will be a blessing to those around me, and that I’ll forever walk with you..knowing deep down You are my shepherd and I shalt not want for you will always make a way as long as I believe. Psalm 23 all day everydayyyyy, Ma did well making us recite that psalm from early.. word for word you know xxx

Let wisdom, knowledge, understanding, insight, foresight and your infinite Love abide in me all the days of my life as well as your goodness and mercy.

To All who have faith, let them continue being the warriors they are, bless their individual walk with you and let us all shine your light to a world that needs to know .. that our saviour lives and yes.. we all will see you face to face once again.

My Love for life, my first Love.. Thankyou Jesus..

In the name of The Father, the Christ and in The Holy Spirit

ONE xxxxxxxx

 

 

 

Sick With Love

Run away…

 sick with Love.

 Run away…

 sick with Love.

The lilies and the daffodills are waving

But there are only tears,

sick with Love.

As the sun, as the rain, and the wind.. sick with Love.

What is to be done?

A scream..

To hide?

Take the gun and suck this life.

Sick with Love.

A naked body is aching, heart is melting.. it is melting till its no more.

Smile is a Scarecrow once again.

Stare limitless crawling in with the atomsphere it has no end.

Why Love. Why torture. Why the pains. Just to hold and slip away, never truly slipping.. always here, always near.

Suffocating strength as weakness.

Wheres home, one belongeth where?

Why Love why do this.. bleeding tears.

Mad.. No.  A dam..neither.

An overflow, an ocean.. so why must one drown.

Why swim endlessly in One. . and yet drown.

Is there courage to save?

Desiring this madness, love.

To watch the madness. Its happened already, Its been done. What more do you want from one?

What more.

One like smoke in the air, one is but a mist.

What are you looking for love.

What do you ask of one.

You’ve taken over, made one a fool too many times. Yes, and one even walked away from you. . but you kept calling back, Love.

You resurrect one time and time again.

Forever keep travelling, keep reliving. . even when Life tries to dis-own one, one keep’s living. This cannot perish, one is held flying, wings floating in the sky.. eye on fire light in one’s world over-powering the darkness.

Faint.

Sick with Love but standing un-moveable, un-shakeable and will not resist.

Sick with Love.

 

 

 

9 x 3 ‘There is a Good in a Bye’

I Let it out – to completely let it go.

I never really got over him.

Somehow I said to myself I would, that he would just disappear as he did before. . he just vanished.

The last words of “I can see you” as I looked around at the bus stop confused. . . where was he?

Going past in a car probably. I was young, still in a bubble, transparent but somehow losing it.

The baby in me startled by his Spirit which I already knew.

Before he changed and became who he was.

I’ve learnt to face it all. My own emotions and feelings, my thoughts – some which weren’t my own. When I met him years ago I felt something, it wasn’t an attraction ..maybe he felt an attraction but I felt something about him which was deep. I don’t know maybe we were secret siblings, or good friends in a past life? Who knows.

This part of me that felt something deep towards him made me fear him, made me not feel good enough to be close to him… although I wanted to know what this thing was. Secretly when I spoke to him I felt like a child but I didn’t really care, I just knew it was okay to be me. Theres alot of things I didn’t forget watching the years unfold until he vanished only to reappear.

I didn’t know what that “thing” was, but when I randomly was on a stroll down the road.. my heart tugged and I heard a silent whisper that made me turn my head. I remember seeing him staring out the window, he was in a daze. The joy of my heart to see a long lost brother who somehow meant something to me.

His smile made me happy, and his presence was calm. .  me, well I was me.. jolly and childish. Everything I had experienced in the past was thrown out the window at that moment, for all I cared about was his soul and if he was okay. Looking into him I saw partially he had dealt with things, things that he may not have been vocal about, but I hallucinated and it seemed like it was all a blur. . but I was there looking out, looking in. The eye connection was real, time and space did stop and for me to still remember it, I KNOW IT WAS REAL.

From that day life went on as normal but I never forgot him.

You see things happen in life that we may tend to look past and not see it as anything, somethings we ponder on but if we do nothing there is no result. I tried here and there but you know, I was never vocal about how I felt because I thought he would’nt care.. which obviously was true. During the time apart my heart longed for him in ways it had not longed for anybody before. Yes I forced myself not too long for this, not to allow it too consume me but it did and as it did it tricked my mind. I became a fool, how could someone you care about for no reason disappear and then reappear to look into me and disappear again? It affected my life heavily. It felt like we exchanged energies, or he entered my mind but somehow, something strange happened and it took me from me.

I thought I was in love with him, but the resentment building up in me due to not understanding why that happened began to eat at me, why did he appear in my dreams and why did he not speak to me ..if he knew something I didn’t. I loved him for him and never understood the reasons why. It may have been a test on me, maybe to remind me of what I was missing out on.. (but if he truly knew why I didn’t come to see him many years ago) he would know I wasnt missing out on anything. Simple as.

Seeing as i’m a mysterious person when it comes to spirituality and faith, I was thinking it was all meant to happen. . somehow stupidly thinking he would come back to me. *rolls eyes* I created a pathetic love story in my head and I guess the energy put out towards it obviously invoked crazy things to happen to me. I had so much faith in this eye connection, it’s ludicrous.

Now fully exposed of myself and my feelings. . . I see I was deeply in love, I did think it was infatuation at first but it continued so I genuinely loved him, what made it worse was having been younger I felt something towards him.. so it kind of made sense why I was drawn to him the way I was.

I thought I learnt having said goodbye so many times in my Spirit to him but somehow I couldnt breakfree from it, somehow it held me tightly whatever this was. This eye connection controlled me, in ways impossible to explain.

Right now, I’ve chosen to move forward. I felt the need to express this, God knows why. Weirdly enough I will always love him in a way but its not the same, I somehow see him as a secret soul brother, one in whom I drove myself crazy for.

In a few years from now I’ll look back at this and laugh.. at how far it took me to craziness, and how far I went to look a fool. If he knew what happened, it probably was fun and games to him, but atleast I tasted the madness of my own love.. to truly see it for what it could be.

True Love is hard to find, I’ve now found it.

Its now living in me, and it’s being shown to me.

I think it’s found me. . . I just have to be patient to believe this is the real one.

I guess there is a good in good bye, afterall.

When something leaves, something new appears.

The mysteries of Love.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Madness’s of Love

In the Madness’s of Love,

Should we stay silent?

Should we not utter a word, if so that itself would be a disgrace to its mastery, or a shame to its many attempts within its own mastery.. as we know it’s never a shame. It’s understood, multiple times. Yes, in our gardens we look upon the many tree’s seeing which will bear the correct fruit. . Dictating ourselves, judging ourselves. Mere men.

We were silent once before, we already knew the illusion of the mystery, The thought of it somehow moulding as an illusion.

Some what,

a dream that was a reality, for even in the mist of dreams we come forth in a different realm,summoning the realities unseen. Does that make the mystery an illusion for real?

The thought of it somehow moulding as an illusion.

Some what,

a dream that was a reality, for even in the mist of dreams we come forth in a different realm,summoning the realities unseen. Does that make the mystery an illusion for real?

We have not concluded, we have an end result and only when we determine it to be an illusion we reject the history of perception, of foolishness, of knowledge increased though remaining the same under the booming sun. I am not I am, no how atrocious of one to speak on matters as such as the highest in any way – he whom believes thyself as God becomes himself delusional. I neither invoke other lives within my existence, for all is of my existence and yet so we are combined with many who were before and who may come after us.

Why do we fail to see the madness of love present with us? Should we pull out our hair, should we run around naked without clothes screaming this truth; should we scream the streets cursing out at our disgust of our ulterior being. . will that reveal to you? In the name of love, we are flying to a place unknown, a territory unheard of, clinging soulfully to this madness.

Was unseen likewise seen and never heard, was known and unknown but never really experienced, was free and yet trapped, was woo’d and yet manipulated, was woke but slept on, was alone and yet with the supreme, was right and then wrong but somehow beyond the surface was the sacrifice, a gift of life.

We knew it somehow, and we bumped into another we. . . and this exalted the highwithin us, a deep vision to see theunfathomable hand of God the Unseen at work in the present making it history to remember – never to be forgotten, lived by us, through us and we fought the survival to stay one with The Supreme One.. The One above all – buried in our madness, our confusion of love.

She looks away understanding already all she needed to know, hiding the sacred within. Helooks away, understanding all he needed to know. . the sacred was aching within him. What does it take to bring such light together, nothing more than the mysterious madness at work.

Nothing more but the madness’s of love.

Daughters of the Land

They walk along curved hips, straight hips. . big tummy, petite tummy.. smooth breasts..Large or small.. rounded as pears, and different shape lips. Hair loose, Hair stood tall. Eyes looking.. Eye for all.

Some smile, some expressionless and others show themselves to be potent. Different color shades all in which makes my tired eyes smile.

Yes, sisters of nations how tender and sweet thou is. . how beautiful you are sunshine.. Oh all these women who carry their world.

Toddlers follow behind as a mother pushes the pram in a mellow mood, sisters running along the streets chasing her brother screaming “I’m going to get you”. Young girls skipping along staring – excited by life.

Elder women chitter chattering about the significant news of yesterday, the gossip of tomorrow. Young ladies conversing on the topic of young men – their joys and their foolery. Young women in short dresses and flip flops skipping through the town, flowing robes and heels knocking on the concrete floor, make up lavishly illustrated on correctly.. beauty being revealed as men watch and stare.

Daughters of the Land we see you.

Gathered around the bbq, the sweet aroma of perfume.. women drinking glasses of wine speaking on the lovers lost, the ones to whom they have given their heart and the jokes of the past. Men are welcome to their parties but some avoid – Daughters of the Land why?

Have you made them fear you. . Have you chased them away. Have you conquered there games and so they are ashamed?

Daughters of the Land . . Have you become like they, dominating your own field so they fear and stay at bay.

Daughters of the Land, Zion looks upon you.. she wonders in her Spirit.. she see’s herself in you – yet she’s always walked alone.

Zion see’s your beauty, her eyes may scare your calm yet don’t be alarmed Oh sister.. she carries a pure heart its a song in the air.

She only wants to tell you how wonderful you are, Zion will not hurt you .. she’s a twinkle that will caress your star.

Daughters of the Land. . .

Zion is really near, when she appears don’t judge.. don’t try to create an atomsphere of fear.

Her eyes are like fire, her soul a living bride, her body covered in roses. . . tender sweet light.

Onycha, Onycha. . . Intra pulchra flos hortum meum. .

Yes the flower garden is arising for us all to be charmed. Silence oh silence, no words Zion says ..but the language of her body will make you all desire to be like men.

Onycha, Onycha. . . Intra pulchra flos hortum meum. .

This is a kingdom armed.

This is a glory charged.

Daughters of the Land – we may seem different you and me. . but we are quite alike.

We only differ for I carry a hidden book, a mystery.. a key .. the treasury of The Eternal Spirit – that governs my life inside.. The Immortal part of me.

Onycha, Onycha. . . Intra pulchra flos hortum meum. .

Daughters of the Land, Zion has come.. yes. . she has come. . .take her hand.

We have come.

The Unspoken Word

She woke up, rubbed her eyes and yawned.. no expression on her face.. a dull but calming feeling lingered her soul. The light of day shining through the window, welcoming her home.

As she sat upright she noticed the calming feeling but the sadness of the past had somehow come back but slowly vanished in her memory. All that had happened, all that had taken place had left a uneraseable memory. . .it could of caused enemity between her own soul and the creation itself but reality was she could not deny the unexplainable lesson learnt in the heart of love. Speechless she was, nothing left to be said. She turnt to her mirror and zoomed into her soul, not quite amazed at what she saw.. just a mere reflection of the rather grand intricate spirit before her. The poise of a warrioress, the eyes of a lethal spear..yet soothing as lavender petals lying in a path of crystalline ice ..her body that of a youthful teen. She smirked,

‘I know you’ she turned her head away from the mirror. Expressionless. ‘I know you’ she repeated in her mind.

She lay back on her bed, looking up at the ceiling having felt the pain of being disconnected in order to reconnect again. Her soul left planet earth for the past 3 years roaming around different dimensions hearing the whispers of spirits as her body and spirit continued to live its life.. this was not the first time her being escaped this dimension and returned to her but this time it was serious, it was judgement, it was war.. war for the crown of life. She smiled, in memory of an old lover she met passing by on her journey before she disappeared into another world. . .escaping planet earths woes of the soul, he caught her attention and she never forgot, she held on. As her spirit reminsced she realized she could not hold on any longer, time had passed and her heart had gotten faint of desiring him. Her lesson was learnt through the holding on of he, through the thoughts and dreams, prayers and life it self reminding her of him. Letting go was the last string.

She wanted to cry, but the tears dried on their own. She wanted the tornadoes to blow it all away, this deep feeling she allowed herself to feel, the souls deep amour for another. As she contemplated the madnesses of lifes change and the love that quite sadly interrupted her souls flow, she understood all things happen for a reason.. this was something she always believed in her spirit, something that never changed. She accepted her heart, her soul, her spirit, her body and her mind. She saw her strength but this was a strength she had always known, had it died?

Had it escaped planet earth into the dungeons of darkness where the light doctors would do a surgery on her being, rejuvenating it to existence, empowering her source. Love.

She blinked. Him.

Everything would be erased, bit by bit her life would come back together after falling apart.

Who knew Love would create such an impact of self. Deep down she always wanted a man to treat her like a princess, something she never experienced but those days and wishes were over. Fairytales were never real.. reality is and in that Love had always been there the guide of Life. She didn’t need a man to love her she needed Life and its divine essence to nurture her, lead her and hold her through the unknown..through the ever changing era’s of love and if that meant she had to travel to different dimensions to understand then so it be for the Divine YAH would always guide her. She managed to make it back safe, bruised, a little strange.. but nothing that would not allow her to live again.. she was always seen as the peculiar kid from young.. so her behaviour would not be a problem.

Him? He just disappeared, soon to be a faint memory she hoped would stay. Gone with the wind, unspoken words, intense emotions, throbbing hearts, endless tears.. gone with the wind the man she would of gave her all too.

Unspoken words are spoken, in silence we find ways of echoing our heart thoughts poetically or spiritually. One must be One.

Never forget

your…

Unspoken Word.