She’s misunderstood, not that she shows she care’s about being “mis-understood” because truly she understands it is all fleeting, at times hoping that the story some-how would be some-what different but all things have their effect in their own ways, weighing everything for it’s time.
Not knowing how to even take herself in those precious moments within she forces words of life in her mind to remind herself of her worth. She laughs because she knows God is her strength but her silence ..her peace is a call for the eternal. To carry another she understands, for this is the cause of her life to uplift and to care, this has always been her cause secretly.. to remind all of the Almighty.. yes, going un-noticed but lovingly so.
Wondering in her soul, would she ever be carried.. maybe she can’t be.. maybe the strength she has to be courageous enough in herself is all she has left to give to others. To give away of herself seems to be the only thing that can help her, she sometimes thinks that another to look upon her and desire her is of utmost foolishness for her ways are not so simple.
It’s the simplicity that seems to cause her ..her own complications. The same situation, to want to help others or do something for others that she believes in her no one could possibly do for her.. nobody could possibly understand.. why because that part is hidden – delicate – and unseen.. she holds it dearly.. knowing thats all she’s ever held on to, showing it to no one, and yes no-body has seen this part of her.. even her ownself shys away from it.. so silence must come and the yearning of the eternal must come.. for it is in this that she can even stand.. otherwise her knees would be weak.. and then she falls.. crawling ..begging the silence to rise from the dust. . and if it rose from the dust o’ an earthquake should occur, storms shall pass, winds be wild and then the passing of a new day yet still she will not be seen in any one of these.
She is not her body and she was never her body, she happened to have been trapped in their as the world carried on without her.. many years ago. She pondered her past and all her mistakes and understood perfection is what she thought she could attain but so much imperfections around her from her young age.. that this perfection she knew seemed far-fetched as it was always made to choose between people, between things, places.. she never really wanted to choose she just thought it was all a playground – a garden until it somehow changed.
She knew that if she didn’t give in to peer-pressure from her youth she would of had no friends, this was a truth she believed. Primary school, secondary school, college .. everything seemed to her false because she was a wandering soul.. and no one would understand the questions she opposed. Even the adults seemed shocked at her questions when she would converse with them or even her silence listening to them. . she knew.. that what was in her.. was not ordinary but it always shook her. She never let go of her sunshine though.. the secret.
People getting close to this part she would chase them away and only give them the part in which she longed to care for them.. just to be in their mist and maybe let off a kind breeze of peace. To pack her bags and be off, to begin again elsewhere as the family did.. she would hope.. only to feel the existence of the same feeling.. to want to pack again and be off.. well it would be a longing but for what cause now.. she is all she will ever have ..and the secret that could never leave her. The Almighty closely watched her and her secret.. and he must of admired it and so placed his hands upon her promising to protect her – that she will always be in his hands.
Who is she, she wonders. . she always wondered. A child of light. . . an unseen source who saw more people in unseen worlds than in reality. Her eyes closed at night from toddling tip toes..would see the worlds and kingdoms and humans never seen.. to sometimes see them in reality or other times.. never to see them. You see.. for this cause it amazed her but yet still she was far away. . so drawing near she can silently smile, daze away.. and say less words unless having to speak that is. . for what she comprehends is not words and was never words.
What she recognized was hidden.. so she was hidden..
And even while open, the secret will always remain in the chambers.
The source well, isn’t God the master comedian in this? The Unseen Sovereign Creator.
She’ll just gaze away, in hope that what she feel’s beyond her brings more life to her.
Love huh.. mis-understood but stood under all the misses and still gazes knowing that it never is missed.. for it is there.. remembered somehow – to Her Own.